Up In Smoke

There are of course many fans of baseball who like to cook.  Some of these fans are even hot women, so here at Chicks Dig Headquarters we are ever vigilant to monitor issues that affect you: "Guy Who Aims to Impress Chicks"!  AND at the bottom of the page is a grilling idea to help you elevate your backyard culinary skills.

A couple of rules here to get us started.  First, baseball is best enjoyed in the movies.  "The Sandlot."  "Field of Dreams" ("The man's done enough.  Leave him alone.")  "Bull Durham".  "A League of Their Own".  (A little shout out to my home of Rockford - nice.)

Second, the Chicago Cubs are awful.  Enough said.

There is a baseball issue in the news that irks me : July 2, 2011 Tampa Rays (formerly Devil Rays - what's up with changing the name?) versus St. Louis Cardinals.  Watch the throwback jerseys the Rays will wear.  They will be sporting the jersey of the Tampa Smokers.  Keith Morelli of The Tampa Tribune reports that the image of the lit cigar in the underscore of "Smokers" will be eliminated.   Click here for the whole story .

Notice the updated jersey STILL SAYS "Smokers"!  Duh!  Take out the cigar and you change the message!  What?  Are you kidding me?  It says "Smokers"!  Choose your own side of the smoke-free debate.  (I'm pro-choice.)

photo: Tampa Bay Rays

This is ignorant on the part of the Tampa Rays organization.  Dabbling in revisionist history is dangerous.  The very idea that we can promote "smoke-free" and safe-guard our children's children for the future is another bone-headed politically correct notion that lazy parents (and legislators) cling to.  They look to goofy acts like this to teach people, old and young, that you don't need to get facts and make decisions appropriate to your needs.  Just trust Big Brother to take care of all your needs.

Do we really think there will come a day when we have eradicated the very idea of smoking?  When an image of a lit cigar will invoke a tiny voice to ask, "Daddy, what's that?"  No.  The choice of smoking is a discussion that every parent must have with their child.  It goes something like this: "Well little Tommy, smoking has been shown to be a habit that can make people very sick.  Some people still like to do it.  I choose to have a cigar once in a while because I like them.  I looked at the risks and decided to smoke only occasionally.  Someday you will have to make your own choice."  (Actual discussion with my own guys.)  Click here to say hi to Dennis

Now don't get me wrong.  Not all smoking laws are evil and off-base.  (Baseball reference!  Ha!  Get it?  The Cubs are evil!)  wait for it, wait for it... okay.  Moving on.  I like the smoking ban in restaurants because I like to taste my pork - not your Camel. 

I promised you a grilling idea.  You got it exhalted Barbeque BigWig!

Here's a way to make smoking work FOR you.  A tip for summertime grilling for ya!  Think of a fresh spice that would complement your grilled meat.  Fresh thyme and chicken.  Fresh chives and beef.  Whatever.  Next time you step out to the grill grab a bunch of fresh herbs from the produce section of the grocery and place six or seven sprigs right next to the meat on the grill and close the lid.  Check it later and you'll see the charred remains of herbal yumminess - yeah go ahead and add some more!  You've got nowhere to go, right?  The smoking herb will infuse the meat with a flavor that you can't get out of jar.  Use this in addition to your regular spices and you'll find combinations that will get you noticed.  Chicks Dig You!

Silence of the Limes

Mark Zuckerberg, this one's for you!

Mr. Zuckerberg founded Facebook (you did see The Social Network, right?  good movie).  Mark has taken to eating only meat that he himself has slaughtered.  The goal of this is to make him more thoughtful about what he is ingesting and thankful for the life of the animal.  He reportedly started with a live lobster and has since killed and eaten other animals: pig, chicken, goat.  When he is not eating meat (because he didn't take them down himself) he eats a vegetarian diet.  Which brings to mind the obvious question:  Who kills the vegetarians that he eats?

Ooooh.  Sorry.  Bad taste.  (Get it?) 

In all seriousness, we here at Chicks Dig Citrus Ranch (home of the Happy Fruit) applaud Mr. Zuckerberg's efforts at conscientous consuming and wish to further his education by offering the proper way to slaughter limes.  Limes are an important part of any health-conscious consumer of... BEER!  Corona plus vitamin C equals nutrition.  Hot women on TV are seen drinking beer - so that means it's true.

We must take proper care to get this delicious vitamin into our diet in a respectful, responsible fashion.

WARNING -  the images presented are graphic in nature and may be disturbing to some... (wussies!)

Click video HERE

What does one do with all those dead but delicious limes?  Make Lime-Tequila Wings baby!

Lime-Tequila Wings

Sweet, Salty, Juicy, Yummy - you get it!  Fan-Freaking-Tastic!

Here's the recipe:



Get your package of chicken wings and make sure they’re thawed.  Put them in a large Zip-type bag and pour in a cup of tequila.  Squeeze the juice from two limes in there and throw in the carcasses.  Sprinkle sea salt (2 Tablespoons or so) on top.  Seal it up and let that marinate for a couple hours.  You are brining the chicken with the salt and adding flavor with the tequila!  God!  How cool is that?  Remember to turn the bag over every once in a while.  Drink some tequila in the mean time.

Heat up the grill to medium-high and space the wings evenly apart.  Sprinkle on a little seasoned salt and grill the wings for ten minutes on each side.  Now turn down the heat to medium-low and finish ‘em off low and slow until they are golden brown and crispy.  This part takes about an hour so take your time.  Every 10 to15 minutes during the low and slow part squeeze a little more lime over the wings.  It's important!  The lime is going to carmelize to a sweet, sticky, yummy glaze!  When your are done, sprinkle on a little sea salt.

Tell all your friends how hard you worked and how much the ladies dig you!