Put Yourself Out There

Dudes (and Dudettes),

Life is not worth playing it safe all the time.  Do you remember in the movie "The Sandlot" when "Squints" plans to drown himself in the pool just to have the lifeguard give him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation?  He took a chance and became a hero that day.

We are not given confidence - it is only earned when we challenge ourselves.  "Squints" walked a little taller that day.

I am going to walk taller in one week or I am going to fall flat on my goofy face.  Here is my challenge.  I volunteered to cook for what I thought was a group of ten people.  It turned out to be twenty-four.  But wait.  It gets worse.  I am cooking petite fillet with mushroom sauce, rosemary-garlic baked potatoes with a lemon compound butter, and I hope to have a nice dessert in there for after the meal and before the dance.

Here's the background.  Every year the high school has a mother-son dance and every year the dancers go out to eat at a local restaurant prior to arriving at the dance.  The highlight of the evening is never the meal - in fact very often the guys get very little to eat and they are rushed.  Not a great way to start the festivities.

This year one of the moms suggested doing an elegant meal at home, without the rush and stress for all the guys - and wouldn't you know it - in a heartbeat I volunteered to cook for everybody.

Now why the hell would I do something like that?  Dude, number one: I never go to these dances - I have sons, no daughters, number two: I know how to cook, number three: my wife and son are going and I want them to have fun and by the way I happen to know  that "Chicks Dig Guys That Cook"!  Oh!  So there you have it - I am putting myself out there.  Cooking for 24 people is quite likely going to be a freaking train wreck.  (Or I could be a freaking legend...)

I want you to put yourself out there too.  It is worth the risk to become a legend - the guy that can be counted on. 

I will do my best to make this a success.  If I fail, I will still have lived the thrill of that roller-coaster ride - but I will be the guy that peed all over himself, stepping out of the ride with kids laughing hysterically at me. 

Keep you posted...

Grocery Store Hell

Express lane check out

Obey your signs.  I actually had a cashier once tell me to come over to the Express (8 Items or Less Only) Lane once when I had a cart heaped with groceries.  Eight items or less?  No, I had probably 88 items.

But I foolishly moved over to her lane with my 8 items and my additional 80 items, knowing that anyone ending up behind me would be pissed as hell.  Can you see where this is going?

Sure enough, some dork in black socks and high-top shoes with fish-belly-white legs and skin tight high school PE shorts buying smokes and beer, picking at his one good tooth ends up behind me.  He mutters under his breath about it being an Express Lane and who the hell can’t count around here?

Naturally I showed incredible self-restraint towards the dental poster boy and stewed silently.  Then, like the stand-up kind of guy I am, I asked the cashier to add his cheap beer and cigarettes to my bill so he could get on his way.  I was his hero and this guy actually began to seek me out in the store.  It got to be a little much, and I had to move to another city.

Don’t let this happen to you.  Obey your lane