Up In Smoke

There are of course many fans of baseball who like to cook.  Some of these fans are even hot women, so here at Chicks Dig Headquarters we are ever vigilant to monitor issues that affect you: "Guy Who Aims to Impress Chicks"!  AND at the bottom of the page is a grilling idea to help you elevate your backyard culinary skills.

A couple of rules here to get us started.  First, baseball is best enjoyed in the movies.  "The Sandlot."  "Field of Dreams" ("The man's done enough.  Leave him alone.")  "Bull Durham".  "A League of Their Own".  (A little shout out to my home of Rockford - nice.)

Second, the Chicago Cubs are awful.  Enough said.

There is a baseball issue in the news that irks me : July 2, 2011 Tampa Rays (formerly Devil Rays - what's up with changing the name?) versus St. Louis Cardinals.  Watch the throwback jerseys the Rays will wear.  They will be sporting the jersey of the Tampa Smokers.  Keith Morelli of The Tampa Tribune reports that the image of the lit cigar in the underscore of "Smokers" will be eliminated.   Click here for the whole story .

Notice the updated jersey STILL SAYS "Smokers"!  Duh!  Take out the cigar and you change the message!  What?  Are you kidding me?  It says "Smokers"!  Choose your own side of the smoke-free debate.  (I'm pro-choice.)

photo: Tampa Bay Rays

This is ignorant on the part of the Tampa Rays organization.  Dabbling in revisionist history is dangerous.  The very idea that we can promote "smoke-free" and safe-guard our children's children for the future is another bone-headed politically correct notion that lazy parents (and legislators) cling to.  They look to goofy acts like this to teach people, old and young, that you don't need to get facts and make decisions appropriate to your needs.  Just trust Big Brother to take care of all your needs.

Do we really think there will come a day when we have eradicated the very idea of smoking?  When an image of a lit cigar will invoke a tiny voice to ask, "Daddy, what's that?"  No.  The choice of smoking is a discussion that every parent must have with their child.  It goes something like this: "Well little Tommy, smoking has been shown to be a habit that can make people very sick.  Some people still like to do it.  I choose to have a cigar once in a while because I like them.  I looked at the risks and decided to smoke only occasionally.  Someday you will have to make your own choice."  (Actual discussion with my own guys.)  Click here to say hi to Dennis

Now don't get me wrong.  Not all smoking laws are evil and off-base.  (Baseball reference!  Ha!  Get it?  The Cubs are evil!)  wait for it, wait for it... okay.  Moving on.  I like the smoking ban in restaurants because I like to taste my pork - not your Camel. 

I promised you a grilling idea.  You got it exhalted Barbeque BigWig!

Here's a way to make smoking work FOR you.  A tip for summertime grilling for ya!  Think of a fresh spice that would complement your grilled meat.  Fresh thyme and chicken.  Fresh chives and beef.  Whatever.  Next time you step out to the grill grab a bunch of fresh herbs from the produce section of the grocery and place six or seven sprigs right next to the meat on the grill and close the lid.  Check it later and you'll see the charred remains of herbal yumminess - yeah go ahead and add some more!  You've got nowhere to go, right?  The smoking herb will infuse the meat with a flavor that you can't get out of jar.  Use this in addition to your regular spices and you'll find combinations that will get you noticed.  Chicks Dig You!

I Am Squints

In the movie "The Sandlot" (referenced in my last blog, so I'm just going with it here) "Squints Palledorous launches himself to the bottom of the swimming pool after years of watching Wendy Peffercorn, the lifeguard rubbing and oiling herself (she knew damn well the boys couldn't help but stare).  Wendy jumps in after Squints and begins mouth to mouth resuscitation - all part of Squints' plan.  He plants a big kiss and walks taller that day.

Today I am walking taller.  After putting myself out there by agreeing to cook for twenty-four people a menu of filet mignon with three mushroom sauce, rosemary-garlic potatoes, bread with lemon-parsley compound butter... I am Squints.

With awesome help from: Tom, Toby, Brian, Tom and Scott we cooked for and served 24 mothers and sons and they left for the dance smiling, happy, and satisfied.  Chicks dig that.

My favorite part is stopping amidst the chaos to enjoy the laughing, smiling faces and the sounds of the dinner plates as the forks are reloaded for another bite of yumm.  We dads hit the obligatory high-fives and soaked in the revelry.  Then got busy plating dessert, pouring wine, refilling water glasses and serving.

For those who asked, here is a rough sketch of how to do the sauce:

Make the sauce the day before, because feeding that many is too difficult to handle every task.  Chop 3 large shallots and saute in butter about five minutes, add chopped shiitake, cremini, portabella mushrooms (about half-pound each) and cook medium-high for 10 more minutes.  Add half bottle of good red wine and reduce heat to medium.  Simmer that until volume of liquid is down to about one-third of total.  Now add 3 cups of low sodium beef broth and simmer that until reduced to half.  At that point I cooled and stored the sauce.

Next day I brought it up to heat slowly and added fresh rosemary and just before serving, adjusted the salt and pepper to taste.  Whisk in a little butter (that's called mounting) and you're ready to go.

The other one that people asked about was the compound butter.  This is a cool thing because you can serve it with bread or vegetables.  OR you can put a little on top of a nice piece of fish or even a steak.  As it melts it turns into its own yummy sauce!  I know!  How cool!

Soften one stick of butter and add the zest of one lemon.  Chop a handful of fresh parsley and stir well.  It will still be soft, so spoon that onto clear plastic wrap and form it into a long tube.  Twist the ends to close and place it into the fridge so it will firm up again.  When chilled, slice into little disks and serve.

Happy People Eating Good Food

rock on,

Squints